Can you give me a description? It's time. My feeling is that it's a difficult decision to make, but that, knowing I really change, knowing I will not be myself, that I elected to do it. I wish to be. To feel more than just inside, to feel outside, too, to feel the outside world, to have it affect me. And so I made the decision to be born. Who gauged this movement for you? When pressed about the worker beings he'd watched, Casey said that they were in effect carrying out instructions from a higher authority.
They are under the control of that Old One. The Old One makes the thought, and they 'do.
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And knows its future and knows its past, and it's sad and not sad, and happy and not happy. By the time they finished with Casey's pre-birth recollections, I was truly disturbed. Casey normally shied away from metaphysical ideas, yet what he'd just described was far beyond the merely metaphysical. It was crazy. My mind was almost numb, but there was still more to hear.
The last incident that Barbara focused on was the sighting of the metallic sphere in December Once again, Casey told of seeing the object from his car, parking at home and walking up the hill, and then watching the sphere above the courthouse. But this time he recalled much, much more.
I'm watching it. It's just like everything narrows into a very tight beam.
And I disappear into that. And that doesn't make sense. I wish I could see. It just washes you with something. Washes everything. How does this lamp wash you? This whole feeling at this time is real trying. Feel like I'm in a small, cramped place.
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Not like a coffin or anything like that, but just in a small. These don't feel, it doesn't feel like the other feelings that I've had. It feels grubbier and dirtier and mechanistic more than spiritual, or loving. Feels like I'm just balled up in a gray cloud on my back.grupoavigase.com/includes/372/6093-bares-para-solteros.php
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It feels small and dank. Like a cellar but not a cellar. It's not wet, but it smells yucky.
Closed quarters, like an old gym, old locker room. It feels cluttered, it feels real cluttered, busier.
It doesn't feel smooth and expansive, like a big ship does. And I don't even know if I'm in a ship. I can't tell, it just feels like I'm in a room and there's all these small scatterings. I mean, it's got walls. Feel like I'm in a room with walls and laying on my back, and I'm being pushed here and shoved there, and. I'm really shutting my mind now to what's going on up there.
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I'm the only 'person' that I feel here, but I could be wrong. It's just, I'm pissed off. They wanted something. They might have made me do something, and they wanted to see something happen, or they wanted something. They need pieces of me so that there is a way to continue. They need something so they can repair, so they can make, so that they correct and fix. And I shouldn't be angry, but it makes me angry when they take me away and don't let me know. I'm old enough now. I know I'm old enough and I care enough. And I don't understand why. And that makes me mad. When Casey was brought back to full consciousness and questioned, he said the memories seemed very real, and I could hear the amazement in his voice as he went back over the experiences.
I was anything but calm, understandably, and equally amazed, but I still couldn't let myself believe that these things had actually, factually, occurred. Not to my husband, not in my reality. I was frantically searching for psychological explanations and coming up empty as we went to bed, and Casey was very quiet. On the trip to Oklahoma we had discussed the possibility that actual contact with UFOs and aliens—whatever they really were—might have happened to him in the past, telling ourselves we could surely learn to live with that knowledge, now that it was all over.
But December was far too recent for comfort, edging much too close to our present lives. Saturday, after we spent the day visiting with two of Barbara's friends and Jack Lee pseudonym , a guest of hers who was a counselor from another state. Barbara and her husband lived in one house, but they owned the house immediately to their left, where Jack, the other guest, was staying.
Casey and I were staying in a third house they owned, directly across the street from Jack.
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Casey went into trance easily this time and proved to be much more clear-sighted and responsive than he'd been the night before. The first incident to which Barbara directed him was a day in Kansas, , when he'd remembered having a bad pain in his nose, for no apparent reason.
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And some boys have just told us, told me and my friend that they saw a UFO land at the top of the field that's across the street from my house. And I think that they're silly, that. We used to play there, it's a big field. It was summertime.
And I was scared, because I didn't know what it meant. I thought they knew what they were talking about. I can see it. The field was like a city block.
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